Polar bears, ice cream, plunging into an icy lake...nope. Not working. It's still hot! I'm not sure if the humidity tipped the thermostat into the forties but it sure felt like it and feels like it might do the same again today. It's the kind of heat that even raising your arm to take a drink of water makes you break out in a sweat.
It does look a bit stormy out there this morning and the air is heavily scented with rain. Probably heat induced thunderstorms are going to roll in. Typical August weather for Southern Ontario. Which is okay, as much as I don't care for storms, because the garden is rather thirsty looking.
Speaking of storms, I made it through Sunday's sermon. Part of the issue is that the microphone volume is really loud which only amplifies the enthusiastic pastor. It actually hurt my ears a couple of times. He doesn't really need it but it's for recording purposes. It doesn't help that anxiety or stress makes my hearing all the more acute.
It made it hard to concentrate on the message as opposed to the message bearer. I found my mind wandering frequently as I doodled in a sketch pad as a grounding tool. Memories I'd sooner forget kept intruding, fueled by the loudness. Tears touched my eyes towards the end as I struggled against the urge to flee. It was a victory. I didn't! Although it left me drained and like a kid at recess I couldn't wait to get out of there.
I'm thinking next Sunday I'll approach him before the service and ask if he'd be willing to turn down the volume. I don't want to speak to the audio tech without running it by him first. Can you imagine?
"Psst, do me a favor. Turn down the pastor!"
There's some irony here. He's going to preach on guarding our tongues.
Lord, I am willing to persevere. You are the one who has filled me with the determination and ability to rise above my challenges time and time again. You are the one who has filled me with the courage to face down and obliterate my inner demons. You are the one who has filled me with the desire to see the difficult things through to the end. My life is in Your hands. Amen!
Help me think cool thoughts.
"But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus." 2 Tim 2:3
The Black River is a journey in faith. It delves into an exploration of life: from the calm, clear waters of the good days, the mundane, to the swirling eddies and deep waters of issues that face every one of us. Thank you for visiting this site. You can contact me personally at: godandtheblackriver@gmail.com
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