I couldn't bear the TV that normally fills the place with noise. My ticking watch seemed excessively loud. Anxiety pricked at my skin like pins and needles. It had been a couple of demanding days at work. I'd been triggered badly so ghosts of the past were nipping at my heels. A warm bath, a fleece hoodie, flannel jammies, snuggling up with my own teddy bear usually help me deescalate but seasoned with the uncontainable thoughts and emotions shared last night...I needed to hear another person.
Some days living alone can be lonely.
I called a friend who listened while I began to pick apart the ghosts. There's something wonderful about speaking the lies that swirl around inside. It diffuses their power. It chases them out of their hidey holes in the darkness and exposes them to the Light. Lies can't handle the Light. They disintegrate like mist.
Still, it's left me feeling raw and vulnerable. Wounds re-opened take time to close up again even if Jesus has wrapped them in healing balm.
There's a meeting today at the local Catholic church regarding human trafficking in our area. I won't be going. Knowing this goes on only adds to the sorrow for the little ones shared last night. Knowing that a young girl was nearly kidnapped off the side of the road earlier this week adds more.
I am feeling less than a miniscule fraction of the pain Jesus must feel for us. To feel more would break my mind. How it must grieve His heart to see the callous disregard we have for each other.
Forgive me, Lord, for my own callous indifference. Help me forgive those who have treated me likewise. Help me, Lord, forgive those who have twisted Your Word, Your message of love, into a cruel weapon of abuse and power. Help me, Lord, forgive myself for the mistakes I've made as a parent, as a person. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.
"And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord." Eph 6:4
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Boundary Study Part 2
"Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God--truly righteous and holy...
The seminar presented by the Waterdown Stop Human Trafficking Committee was an excellent presentation of facts, suggestions, dialogue, and videos. I came away armed with information, ideas, websites, and contacts. There are petitions that can be signed, websites of groups that are taking positive action, and a potential local initiative. Becoming aware and informed is the first step that can be taken. We need to know what to look for, as well as how to try to prevent this, and ultimately, how to help those caught in the "industry" of the sex trade. We need to contact our politicians and legislators in order to improve our laws.
ReplyDeleteSo thank you Sue, for talking about this. Human trafficking has multiple causes and multiple effects, one of which is that those who have been exploited usually end up with PTSD. We have to take this evil out of the closet if we are ever to fight it.
The Waterdown Stop Human Trafficking Committee can be found on Facebook, and blogspot (this web host).